May11

9 Invaluable Safety Tips Stock Photography Taught Me

by Greg Jensen on May 11, 2012

While searching the internet for some tips on staying safe, I stumbled onto some stock photography websites.

Yes, stock photography – that ever-accurate reflection of real life, that mirror of the way things really are. As we all know, nothing is more realistic than a stock photo.*

I’m sharing these stock photography-based tips with you so that you might protect your home from nimble and nefarious burglars, lazy security dogs, sticky-fingers Santa, and more.

1. Burglars are spry dancer-types who will nimbly out-maneuver attempts at capture.


2. Santa is a bad man.


3. Don’t get a security dog because all they do is surf the Internet all day.


4. People in hoodies are not to be trusted.


5. Old people are scary.


6. Always remember to leave cash hanging out of your pocket.


7. Lady burglars will steal your heart.


8. I should leave my doors and windows open, so a burglar doesn’t break them trying to get inside.


9. Use your computer outside where no one can see what you’re working on.


* Not really.